Learn how to say “no”

Sometimes you gotta learn how to say “no” to certain people so you can prevent yourself from becoming stressed out. You shouldn’t give yourself away until you’ve built a solid base of what you need. You won’t have the pizzazz to give to others until you give to yourself first.

Annie Carns learned this lesson the hard way. She’s the character in the Broadway musical “Olklahoma,” who described how split apart she felt emotionally in the song, “I Can’t Say No:”

I’m jist a girl who cain’t say no,
I’m in a turrible fix
I always say “come on, le’s go”
Jist when I orta say nix!

Like Annie, you “orta” learn how to say “nix” and “no” and nada and no way José. You need to protect your special gifts, those talents that need and deserve nourishment. Your gifts won’t blossom without being attended to. How can you carry the burden of responsibility for other people before you take care of you first?

How to learn to say “No”

Create a setting where you can grow. Learn to say “no” to anyone who tries to intrude into your setting. “No” is a powerful word. Many of you feel uncomfortable saying it. So give yourself a practice session right now by repeating “no” to yourself over and over again for a minute.

Now, didn’t that feel good? It’ll feel even better when you learn how to say “no” to someone who tries to take advantage of your time. If that person persists, assert yourself by saying, “I use the word “no” as a complete sentence. What part of  no don’t you understand?”

Learning how to say no is a powerful tool especially when dealing with difficult people. 

Copyright © 2015 by Ransom Place



About the Author

RANDY PLACE IS A JOB-FINDING and executive coach, writer on career topics, broadcaster, and host of yourcareerservice.com. For twenty-three years, he helped thousands of employees who had been let go from JPMorgan Chase find jobs. And he coached executives at CBS Television, Pitney Bowes, and major outplacement firms in New York on job-finding techniques, communications skills, and selling strategies. An accomplished seminar leader and speaker, Randy has designed and presented workshops on interviewing, telephoning techniques, job-search writing, and sales training nationwide. Randy's groundbreaking nationally syndicated radio series, Your Career Service, has been heard on over two hundred radio stations across the United States. And his articles on career topics have appeared in the Wall Street Journal's National Business Employment Weekly. A former broadcast journalist in New York, he has also been a commercial spokesperson for an array of national and regional advertisers. In addition, Randy was a sales executive at NBC Radio and the New York City sales manager for syndication at Wolper Productions. He holds a Bachelor's in Sociology and Broadcasting from Syracuse University, and a Master's in Journalism from New York University.